Letters to my fallen angel
by MinoBino221
Summary: Santana writes Brittany a little letter on the 6th year anniversary. Mentions of Brittana!Baby Rated M for trigger subjects


**Letters to a fallen angel**

_This is Goodbye_

_It's been six years now since you were taken away from me. Every day I wish I could hold you one last time or kiss your lips once more but I know that will never happen. I know I'll never get to have you in my arms or run my fingers through your golden hair. I know I'll never see your smiling face again. I'll never hear that beautiful laugh and I'll never get to see my little girl grow up. I cry every night picturing you holding her in your arms. I imagine holding both of you every night but reality is that I will never get the chance to do so. The night I lost you will remain the worst day of my entire life. You know I was in a meeting when I got the call. I wished it was a horrible joke or just a simple mistake…but it wasn't. In that moment I realized my wife and unborn daughter were gone, gone forever. It was in that moment that I knew I would never get to hold my little girl and I'd forever imagine the day I'd get to touch her little face or hold her little hand. It pains me deeply to know that throughout the rest of my life I'll never see you again. Only memories of what we once had and will never have again. Brittany S. Pierce I will always love you, forever and always._

Santana sat sobbing on her bathroom floor. A bathroom she'd once shared with her wife. It was the six year anniversary of the blonde's death and what would have been her six year old daughter's birthday. The Latina's stomach churned uncontrollably as she gripped onto the edge of the bathtub. Warm tears streamed down her face as she imagined Brittany smiling with the little girl. This day should have been filled balloons and birthday cake. There should have been a smile edging across perfect pink lips and a small dark haired little girl grinning from ear to ear celebrating six years of life. Visions of the life she was supposed to have flooded through her mind. Her life wasn't supposed to end up this way. Everything had been so perfect before. Santana had a wonderful career, a beautiful wife, and a little baby girl on the way.

All of that ended in that night. That night changed so much in her life and left her stripped with absolutely nothing. Truthfully she had nothing to live for. Everything that ever made sense in her life was gone. Every good thing she had once encountered was ripped from her now frail arms. It was her time now; she'd suffered enough living her life without Brittany. It was time for her to see the blonde's face again in person. It was time…after six long years of misery an ill fortune to be laid to rest. She was going home to Brittany and her little girl. She needed them and there was only one way to do that. She pulled her thin frame up using the tub to stable her unstable legs and she reached for the knob. She let her fragile thin fingers turn the water on and dark eyes watched as water filled the perimeter of the big bath tub. The warm water powerfully spewed into the tub and Santana's eyes fluttered open and shut as she sat on the edge of the tub removing each article of clothing piece by piece. She reached behind her back pulling down the zipper of dress exposing her undergarments. She shucked it to the floor closing her eyes as the tears fell onto her skin.

Stripping her panties and bra she slid into the water, reaching up to stop the flow spouting from the faucet. The water was warm and it relaxed her body completely. Leaning far back she let the water rise up to her so that only her eyes nose and mouth we're exposed. Her voice was shaky as she spoke her last words. "I'm coming home Brittany. I can't wait to see you and my baby girl" She whispered out through a raspy voice before lowering her face into the water. Her eyes stayed open wide as her vision became blurry from the water in her eyes. A soft expression covered her tanned face as she let the water take over her. There was no anger or stress anymore, just a simple and blank expression. Flashes of Brittany throughout her whole life scattered across her mind as she blinked every few seconds and spots of black took over. The spots grew larger and Santana began to blink simultaneously as she felt her chest burn from the lack of oxygen. She forced her body to stay under water as her feet moved around below and her body fought against her but she wouldn't let her body win. She needed to be with Brittany and she wouldn't stop until she was face to face with the blonde that she loved so much. Her eyes crossed between each other before closing and her body laid flat in the water. Her strength and will to live we're gone. Her life ended a long time ago, six years to be exact. Santana was just physically finishing the job herself, pulling the trigger so to speak. Nothing was anchoring the Latina to this world and her life was over.

**I wrote this a while ago and I was thinking about writing a few more chapters! Tell me what you think.**


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